I had to attempt it!
I wasn’t ready, but I felt something new.
This is my first experience of anything like this. The first time a perfectionist didn’t plan for this. I held Tolu’s hands and I wasn’t afraid. It was us against the world, and that was all that mattered. We were expecting a baby.
I had flushed cheeks holding the face of the most beautiful man I had ever seen. I said to him, “Babe, this will change a lot,” and knowing T, he always reassured me.
Every time she kicked, I felt something new, and that was all that mattered. A girl he would cherish like her mother, he had said. Looking like the happiest man I have ever seen.
I held his hands in the theater room, screaming, smiling, and crying at the same time. The birth of a baby and its mixed feeling.
I pushed her out and held her. He kissed my forehead and kissed hers. I could feel her warmth. I could feel his warmth.
Tears trickled down the side of my eyes. I had my world exactly where I wanted it.
All I could think of was the family I had in my arms at that moment. The most beautiful feeling anyone could have ever asked for.
I was losing my breath. I felt life draining out of me like a punctured bucket full of water. A feeling unlike any I had ever felt. I held my baby and the best man I ever loved held me. My best part, my best man. The doctors started panicking and took my babies away from me.
Eyes shutting off. What’s this feeling? Why am I weak? I could feel life leaving me.
Am I ready to accept that this would be the last time I will see and feel them?
I wasn’t ready, but I felt something new.
I hope I followed the script. If you ever decide to jump on this, do tag me, please. I'd love to read it.
